Inspired by HBR article
“Build Self-Awareness with Help from Your Team” by Audrey Epstein
A Harvard study showed that 95% of people think that they are self aware - but only 5-15% of people actually are!
An important trait of an effective team is that they give effective feedback in a positive way.
Peers in high performing teams feel accountable for each other’s success, and willingly provide support and candid feedback with a spirit of generosity to help each other be at their best.
They will
- spend time debating, discussing problems, and making decisions
- address unacceptable team behaviors promptly
- give each other tough feedback
- Talk about those “undiscussables” that others can’t talk openly about
There are 2 types of teams says Audrey
Crappy teams - that have distrust, politics, infighting, and gossip
And
Awesome teams - that have trust, candor, feedback, shared goals, and joint accountability.
They talk honestly and openly about each other’s strengths and weaknesses, and because they trust each other, they assume positive intent when the tougher conversations happen. It’s ok to mess up and fail. It’s ok to be vulnerable
What if you could get honest insights and feedback from coworkers who are truly committed to your success and get to see you in action all the time, on both your best and worst days?
You can, and you will, if you build an Awesome Team.
Imagine if you were surrounded by people motivated to give you useful feedback says Audrey Epstein - an emotional intelligence guru!
She gives 5 tips to building a great team
- Assume positive intent. Give your teammates the benefit of the doubt. Assume they are providing feedback not to judge you but to make you better.
- Talk to your teammates, not about them. You can’t solve problems with gossip. Venting without follow-up action ensures that you are building cliques and solidifying rifts. It takes courage, but talking directly and respectfully with teammates when something goes wrong can solve many misunderstandings without creating drama or bringing others into it.
- Care about your teammates’ success. Start by taking an interest in your teammates’ success. Ask questions about their concerns, know what their goals are, help where you can, and be a good listener and collaborator. You can’t be a great teammate if you don’t know what drives others’ success.
- Push your teammates to do their best work and vice versa. Great Teams, have members challenge each other to reach their goals. They don’t spend energy watching their own backs, so they take risks and reach higher. Start by asking your teammates to challenge you. Bring them ideas and ask for input. Ask for feedback on your plans. Embrace the idea that your teammates make you better.
- Ask for personal feedback. Before offering feedback, ask for it first. Ask your teammates what you could do to better support their success. Ask peers for suggestions on one behavior you could work on to become a better teammate. Give permission for teammates to share feedback by asking for it regularly and listening openly. Thank others for giving you feedback.
It’s up to you to build a great team of people who know, like and trust you. You need to nurture those who will support you, and challenge you to be your best.
Surround yourself with people who will speak their truth, even when it’s hard. And then listen. When you do, you will see an amazingly positive impact — on you, on them, and on the overall success of your team.
- Great teams deliver stronger results, faster. They’re more innovative.
- They challenge you to learn more quickly and to be at your best.
- And, let’s face it — they’re simply more fun to work with.
As my mentor Alllen Pathmaraja says ... there is
EQ, IQ and most importantly LQ - likability quotient!
Best
Ivan
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